Domestic Discipline Lifestyle

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Alpha Male + Maturity

Being a Dominant, or Alpha Male, doesn't make you the HOH in your relationship or marriage.

When I look back at my first marriage, she was 17 and I was 18.  I was certainly an Alpha male and a Dom but she was also dominant.  However, if I'd been mature as well she would have melted in my arms and submitted to me.  It's not just a matter of who is more dominant and who is more submissive, although that is a big factor, it's a person's level of maturity.

She was raised by a single mom and had a little sister so at a much younger age she had to take over certain responsiblities like laundry, dishes, cooking dinner and so on.  Because her mother was working full time to support the family and her dad was out of the picture my first wife had to grow up soon and mature.  I, on the other hand, didn't grow up having those responsibilities at a young age.  So when we married we were right for each other but off when it came to equal levels of maturity.  Thus, the marriage ended because of a wide variety of problems that later occured.

I suppose my point is that you can't be a Dom or HOH unless you're also mature and responsible.  That along with being Alpha male is a huge appeal to women who are willing and wanting to submit and be in a DD/HOH relationship. 

Spank Her 4 Real Girls In Training

Every Dom knows, as should submissives, that there's a good deal of training involved when dealing with a submissive.  Our new store "Spank Her 4 Real Girls in Training" focuses on how to train a submissive in the ways of pleasing her Dom.

We have produced these videos through Spank Her 4 Real Videos and they are still on that store available for download but will be moved to our new store.  Spank Her 4 Real Videos will stay exclusively with Domestic Discipline in regard to spanking only while our Girls in Training store will have Spanking and sexual content.  Eventually all of what we refer to as "Training clips" will move to our new store.  However, we are re-editing them for better viewing pleasure and that's taking some time.  On many of our early clips we produced a split scene clip and in our new store we will still offer the first version but in addition we will have re-edited versions without the split version too.

You can click on the top picture to visit our new store.  Hope to see you there.

Spanking works wonders!

It's a strange thing really.  In vanilla relationships the husband might say, "The house is getting too cluttered," and the stay at home wife might reply, "I'll try to work on it today."  If she doesn't then who knows what happens.

In a HOH, CDD household the husband might say, "The house is getting too cluttered," and the stay at home wife might reply, "I'll work on it today."  The difference is that she knows that it's gotten too cluttered, right now because of the Holidays and now she has heard it's time to get back to organization of the household.  She also knows that if she doesn't get the house, living room at least, in order by the time the husband comes home he will sit down at the kitchen bench, pull down her pants and panties and spank her because she knows it should have been done.

This relationship works well for so many relationships out there because it's straight forward and honest.  There's no bantering or arguing.  It's simple, "This needs to get done and it's your job to do it."  When it doesn't get done then motivation is needed.

I give two kinds of spankings.

I give two kinds of spankings, generally.  One is the sound and hard spanking from beginning to end.  The other is more of a warm up spanking and ends sound and hard.  My wife like neither of them but accepts which ever spanking I'm going to give her.


Because her spanking are real she doesn't like to be told at noon, from a text when I'm at work, that she's going to get a spanking when I get home.  She gets filled with anxiety and thinks about it so much that she can't get anything else done.  


It's best that when I wake up in the morning, around 3:30 to get ready for work, and see she failed to do something she was told to do that I wait until I get home.  She wants her spanking fairly quick after she's been told that one is due.  A big part of it is that she feels she's disappointed me and doesn't want to feel that for very long.  If she's told early in the morning that a spanking is due when I get home then that disappointment and anxiety is terrible.


Her spankings are great therapy because once she gets spanked for something, she usually does really well to not repeat what she did or failed to do. 


After her spanking is over she is very quick to wrap her arms around my neck and hug me tight.  I would imagine those who don't understand Domestic Discipline at all would be more inclined to leap of my lap and run.  But then they wouldn't have gotten across my lap to begin with and I certainly wouldn't have put them there.

To Spank or Not to Spank

Friday morning I left for work with a picture of the living room in my head.  Later, after getting to work I realized I wanted to discuss the living room situation with my household so that it was clear to everyone that empty glasses, opened and read mail, shoes, etc, were picked up every night.  That way I, and everyone else, comes out to a relatively clean living room in the morning.

I later texted my wife to tell her I wanted to talk about the living room when I got home.  It is her responsibility to keep the house in order but others should be putting things away that they use or bring out and not use her as a maid.  So I simply wanted to make that clear.  You bring something into the living room to use, take it away when you're done.  I then received a  text back from her saying, "Does talking about the living room mean OTK?"

She revealed at least on thing when she sent her text to me and that was that she was aware the living room needed attention.  I must say I liked the idea that she thought she was in for a spanking because of the mess in the living room, however, the mess in the living room was caused by others simply not putting their things away so she did not have a spanking coming.  I simply wanted to talk with everyone and I suppose, give warning, that they need to put their things away or there would be some OTK happening when they don't.

So, we get that settled, that I just want to talk and not spank about the living room and no sooner do I get a text saying that she has run out of gas.  Now, here's the thing.  She shouldn't have run out of gas because the vehicle she ran out of gas in wasn't suppose to leave the driveway.  But, because she was running late, she decided that driving just a few miles wouldn't be a big deal.  Apparently, just as she drove into the parking lot it staled and she ran out of gas right then and there.

When I get home from work I'm pretty beat.  My drive home takes about 45 minutes and by the time I peal myself out of the car my body wants to do nothing but shower and rest.  So when it happens that I have to come home, grab a gas can, drive to the gas station and then put gas in a vehicle that shouldn't be where it is when I'm putting gas in it, then I get a tad upset.

You could see it on her face the entire time too.  The question of "Am I going to get spanked here in the parking lot or at home?"  And the "All's well that ends well" stuff that she came up with was priceless too.  By the time it was all over and I drove it back to the driveway of our home I could only think about how much I loved her and that all I would really do was give her a warning that, "Next time I say don't drive the vehicle, don't drive it or your bottom gets blistered."  Now you have to picture that when I said this she was over my lap with her pants still on wondering when they would be coming down and how hard and long the spanking would be.  Instead she gave her uncontrollable nervous giggle of relief after finding out there wasn't going to be a spanking and gave me a huge hug instead.

So I went through all that to tell you that sometimes "Not Spanking" is just as effective as "Spanking".  That's my perspective and I'm sticking to it!

Another Dominant's Perspective

It is such a clear understanding that when something needs to be done and isn't or something hasn't been done that should have been, a spanking is on the way.  There's no debate, or arguing about it.  It's simply cut and dry and right to it.  I can't imagine any other way.

The same goes for sexual gratification.  My wife feels it's her duty to sexually satisfy me so she does.  She enjoys that I come into the kitchen and put my hands all over her while she's cooking or doing whatever.  She feels wanted.   She made it a point to tell me that it was fine to remind her, with a spanking, if she was lacking in the area of pleasing me sexually too.  Spanking can be such a good thing.

A thought on Domestic Discipline

 

I was at work just shooting the breeze with a fellow worker and mentioned that I had dinner late the night before.  He is in his late 20's and thinks a bit differently about things, mostly because he's much younger than I am.  Anyway, he asked why and I told him my wife was out running errands.  I knew his next statement would be, "So why didn't you make dinner yourself?"

I suppose I wanted to see what his reaction would be so I said, "That's not my job.  I have my job and my wife has hers."  I wanted to go further and say that when my wife doesn't do her job, at home, she is put across my lap and spanked but I refrained.

His reaction was exactly what I thought it would be when he replied, "What!  You're kidding right?  Are your hands broken that you can't fix your own dinner?"  Now to me his statement comes from a young person who has been, dare I say, brainwashed.  I grew up totally believing in equal rights and women's emancipation.  At my house, growing up, it was like "Meat Head" (Me) and "Archie Bunker" (my father).  We were always getting into it because he was really old fashion and I was a new thinker.

But along life's journey something happened.  It happened just after my first marriage ended when a bill collector came after me for a bill that my ex-wife and I signed on.  The person stated that they always come after the "Head of the House" for the payment.  Head of the house?  That was my first big slap in the face that you can talk equal rights all you want but there was nothing equal about this bill collector coming after my money and not hers.

That's when I started realizing that men and women aren't equal, we're different.  Now I don't mean that women are less than men and that men are better than women.  What I mean is that we are different.  It took years of realizing first hand how true that statement is.

Eventually I came to the realization that since the world recognized me, the husband, as the head of the house then I should start acting like one.  In other words I was the one responsible, in the end, for how things in my household go or turn out.  For me it makes total sense.  When I wasn't being the head of the house I could blame most of the problems in my relationships and household on let's just say, not me.  But now, and it's been this way for years, the buck stops here.

So, if I come home from a 10 hour day's work and dinner isn't being prepared or ready when I get home then something needs to change.  My wife needs to schedule her time better so dinner is ready.  Again, I have my job and she has hers.  If I don't do my job then a plethora of things could happen, not to mention losing my job.  If she doesn't do her job she simply gets put across my lap and spanked.  I think she's got it better off.

My Dynamics of Domination

To dominate is to; control, rule, govern, direct, dictate or take over.  But, for me, it's first and foremost to Lead.  I have little desire to control anyone, I'm still working on controlling my thoughts and actions.  I have no desire to rule over anyone or to be a dictator.

For me it's about leading and nurturing.  If I am to lead in my relationships with submissives then I must set the example.  I see too many Dominants who desire only to be served and waited upon.  I've met many in my life who were simply lazy and were Dom's because they were able to talk the talk and cast their spell.  But when it comes to walking the walk they stumble more than their submissives.

To lead others you must set the example.  Being a Dom isn't just bending your submissive over and spanking her bottom.  As a dominate, do you spank because you're a sadist and like to inflict pain or do you spank to correct a behavior that need correcting?

Well, this is some of my thoughts on my dynamics of domination.